A Very Merry Vampire Knight Christmas
by candtcane
Summary: instead of seeing Santa this the Night Class held a Secret Santa. And this is the story of what happened.


This year for Christmas the night class decided not to visit Santa, but instead have a Secret Santa.  
So all their names were put into a paper bag and each one drew a name.  
Aidou drew Zero's name  
Zero drew Chiji's name  
Chiji drew Shiki's name

And so on. So when Christmas morning came...  
Aidou: (5:30 at night) SANTAAAA! But I have to pee... But SANTA! *runs into lounge*  
Shiki: Aidou! Stop running! You might run into him!  
(Shiki has Santa tied upside down hanging from the ceiling)  
Aidou: Nu-uuuuh!  
Shiki: Shhhh! I didn't expect you to cum... If you'll keep it a secret I'll share him with you!  
Aidou: Okay! *starts helping Shiki drag Santa up the stairs* Why are you doing this anyway?  
Shiki: ... to see if he tasted like peppermint. Now hurry! Everyone will be up in a few minutes and we'll have to start the gift exchange!

Shiki and Aidou: *drag Santa's fat ass up the stairs*  
Yuuki: *just waking up* Num. guuuuun murnnin *still recovering from the thanksgiving turkey bite* (see Kizee's thanksgiving story)  
Chiji: *runs down steps* *trips* *falls* *barrel roles down the stairs*  
Zero: AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!  
Shiki:*coming out of room* well let's get this over with  
Kaname: So what did everyone buy me?

Zero: THE WORLD, MY LOVE!  
Akatsuki: ZERO! He's hung over Kaname-sama... we had a party-  
Kaname: I party I was not invited to?  
Akatsuki: OKAY! CHRISTMAS EVE SMEX AND HE'S JUST HUNGOVER IS ALL!  
Zero: *hiccup*  
Kaname: ... I want Christmas smex...  
Everyone: *backs away*  
(TV flashes on)  
(Vampire) Person: This is terrible! Vampren around the world have woken up to no Christmas Presents! Is this a new form of racism or is Santa really missing?  
Shiki and Aidou: (now back downstairs) *slump down in seats*  
Yuuki: (recovered) Oh no! This is terrible! Those children need presents and-  
Ruka: Hey Yuuki?  
Yuuki: Hm?  
Ruka: *knocks her out with lamp*  
Kaname and Zero: :O  
Ruka: Did you want to deliver presents to all those children?  
Kaname and Zero: *shakes head*  
Ruka: Then shut up, my bitches.

Chiji: PRESANT TIME! Who wants to go first?  
Aidou: Oooohhh ooooohhhhh me me! *raises hand high in air*  
Chiji: :) okey dokey  
Aidou: *pulls big box out from behind the tree* to you my dearest Zero  
Zero: Eh thanks? *opens box* :O  
Ruka: What is it whore?  
Zero: *pulls out lingerie*  
Yuuki: SMEXY!  
Zero: Okay? *puts back in box* now my turn *pulls out medium sized box from under tree* here you go Ichiru  
Chiji: its Ichijo  
Zero: Whatever. Just open it  
Chiji: *pulls on paper* Uhh...the paper won't come off  
Zero: :3

Chiji: Well I'll read the card... *the card won't open*  
Yuuki: ANYWAY! Here, Rima! I got this for you! ^^  
Rima: Hair... dye?  
Yuuki: Don't most gingers hate their hair color? *tilts head* wouldn't you rather be a burnet like me?  
Rima: None of us do and like hell I would! Shiki!  
Shiki: *sweating as he watches the screen* Uh yes?  
Rima: Dye IT brown!  
Shiki: It?  
Rima: IT!  
Shiki: *stupid moron that he is walked away*  
Chiji: WAAAAAAAH D:  
Zero: *keeps eyeing his present*  
Yuuki: You can put it on Zero...  
Zero: N-no way would I!  
Shiki: *comes down with a chunk Santa's beard dyed brown*  
Rima: WHERE DID YOU DYE YOUR HAIR?

Ruka: More importantly where did you shave that ball of fuzz from?  
Shiki: ;)  
Ruka: GROSS!  
Chiji: *not paying attention to what is going on around him* IT WONT OPEN!  
Kaname: Let me see it! *takes box from Chiji* *tears paper right off*  
Chiji: :O you tore the card into pieces! Now how am I suppose to know who it is from?  
Akatsuki: he handed it to you and said it was from him  
Chiji: Oh well. *tries to open box*  
Box: *won't open*

Chiji: *falls to the ground* WHY WORLD? WHY?  
Akatsuki: 8peeks in the box* Oh, you'll love it! *let's the lid fall back into place.  
Chiji: Ah! :D *runs over to take off lid*  
Box: *DENIED*  
Chiji: *walks into the bathroom and crawls into the toilet* Goodbye, cruel world.  
Shiki: NO ICHIJO-SAN!  
Kaname: Well if you really want to *presses flush handle thing*

Chiji: *to shiki* your present is the tiny one under the tree *goes down toilet*  
Shiki: good-bye my love :'( *goes to tree* *finds present with his name on it* *opens* *pulls out heart locket necklace. inside is a picture of shiki on one side and on the other there is a picture of Chiji* :'(  
Kaname: oh quite your bawling you baby. Now on to the important things. WHAT DID I GET FOR CHRISTMAS?

Yuuki: You heartless Jerk! *goes and hugs Shiki*  
Everyone: *slaps Kaname before joining into the group hug*  
Shiki: *sniff* Th-thankyou. *looks at Kaname* Ehehehehe :)  
Kaname: GUYS!  
Yuuki: SHUT UP! Don't come back until you find Chiji-san! Or I'll never talk to you again!  
Kaname: Is that a threat?  
Yuuki: UGH! GO!  
Kaname: *steps in toilet* You all really want me to do this?  
Everyone: LEAVE!  
Kaname: Well okay... *flush*

Yuuki: You heartless Jerk! *goes and hugs Shiki*  
Everyone: *slaps Kaname before joining into the group hug*  
Shiki: *sniff* Th-thankyou. *looks at Kaname* Ehehehehe :)  
Kaname: GUYS!  
Yuuki: SHUT UP! Don't come back until you find Chiji-san! Or I'll never talk to you again!  
Kaname: Is that a threat?  
Yuuki: UGH! GO!  
Kaname: *steps in toilet* You all really want me to do this?  
Everyone: LEAVE!  
Kaname: Well okay... *flush*

Zero: Do you want to know what I got him?  
Chiji: *sticks head out of toilet* YES!  
Everyone: Chiji?  
Kaname: He wasn't all that far down there.  
Shiki: CHIJI!  
Chiji: *pushes shiki away, and pulls out box Zero gave to him* Why won't this box open!  
Akatsuki: What are you talking about? I got it opened.  
Chiji:*pulls on lid to box*  
Box: Wrong (also see Kizee's Thanksgiving story)  
Chiji: *pulls more* please?  
Box: Wrong  
Chiji: PLEASE!  
Box: WRONG!

Chiji: But-  
*Santa comes tumbling out of the closet he was shoved in and down the stairs, squishing many Night Class vampires that no one cares about in the process*  
Santa: Ho... Ho... Ho... *tongue rolls out of mouth*  
Everyone: It's Santa! :D  
Rima: With a brown dyed beard... SHIKI!  
Shiki: O.O  
Chiji: Please?  
Box: WRONG  
Everyone: *starts shoving Shiki into the toilet*

THE END


End file.
